I embark on a similar undertaking
for myself, switching out woolen sweaters for cotton skirts and tall black
boots for open toed anything. As I was
trying on skirts the other day I came to realize that some of my skirts were
feeling a wee bit tight. I put on my
trusty teal green cropped pants and lo and behold, they betrayed me and were a
little snug as well.
Now, I am not a girl who has
weekly weigh-ins. I have always gone by
a simple measure of how my clothes fit - and by the adage of everything in
moderation- so I enjoy my cheeseburgers as much as I appreciate a damn good
salad. I also try very hard to never, ever call
myself fat, especially in front of Sophie and Katie. I am acutely
aware of girls and self image and how much of a direct – and hopefully -
positive influence I have upon their growing little bodies and self
esteem. So I tell them that I run
because it makes me feel strong and happy and it is good for my body and they
should enjoy sports or being active for the same reason.
I think that Fat and Diet are
mean, nasty curse words. Too many women
have these words embedded in their brains and vocabulary and I refuse to be one
of them. I exercise because those
endorphins rush through me and that feeling translates into feeling confident
in a bathing suit - that is what is important.
I know that I will never be a size four, so I will make my body size the
best it can be.
But trying on my clothes the
other day I began to realize that I had put on a few pounds – not much, but
enough to make my clothes feel snug. So
I tried to think about what I have been doing to cause this small weight
gain.
I came to realize that it has
been what I have not been doing. I realized that I had not exercised one bit
in the past three weeks. I tried to
figure out and sift through my daily time to understand why. I realized it is just so hard to squeeze it
all in, every single day - work, sleep, play, what not, and my most dreaded of all life
maintenance, housework.
Anyone who knows me knows what a
joyless task I find cleaning to be. I
know that adult life can be littered with tasks that must be performed to keep
it all chugging along, but the amount that has to be done to just keep a path
clean from one room to the next is depressing to me. It is one the ultimate catch 22’s in my
life. I love my home – I spend a great
deal of time in it and I love having it filled with friends and family, so some
sort of order must be maintained. Yet I
resent every moment that I spend sweeping the kitchen floor of crumbs that magically
appear three minutes later.
And I don’t care so little that I
am just going to let it go to squalor, because, well, I don’t want my house to
look like total crap.
When I clean, I begrudge every
second I spend doing something I hate, wishing I was doing something else. When my house is a mess of piles, sticky
floors and dust bunnies it makes me cuckoo.
And I don’t think it is fair to ask Cliff to do more – he is not one of
those guys who complains while I’m vacuuming, telling me to keep it down so he can watch the
game, and get me another beer while I’m up. He is a full, contributing member of this
home, with an overflowing amount of life to contend with as well.
I have been sacrificing my work-out time for
housework – and that is not cool. Something has to change.
I wonder if you have tried committing to a work out or running time. Saying to yourself, or putting on the calendar in the kitchen that such and such a time three days is for your workout. The cleaning will always be there, waiting.
ReplyDeleteI love this - Such a simple idea to block it out. I know nothing happens unless it is on the kitchen calender! (and it is so true - that cleaning will ALWAYS be there)
ReplyDeleteWe've just got the one kid and these three asshole dogs, Steve does the laundry which probably contributes mightily to my not hating housework. Maybe because my job involves so much planning and not doing, housework is kind of nice for me because I get to see (and smell, OMG) the result of my labor. Sometimes it doesn't get done until there's mold on the shower curtain and dust bunnies bigger than the dogs, and some mornings I curse the other members of this household's inability to remove their G.D. clothing from the living room, but otherwise me and chores are pretty copacetic.
ReplyDeleteI'll skate behind your run if you need inspiration. I'll curse if you want.