I ventured out to Target last week to try and score some cute stocking snuffers. Try as I might I could not get into the mood. Nothing seemed to fit or made me clap my hands with Christmas glee. Rare for any trip to the mega store I left with nothing. Nothing! In my despair, afraid that I was slipping into a Scroogian holiday mood - which is verboten with two kids who believe - I ended posting on Facebook something like, "If I can't buy it at Goodwill or Rite Aid it's not ending up under my tree". One friend suggested buying tampons for all and then another posted that this was the beginning of a great holiday song. So my friend, and funny man Rick Crowley and I wrote this one together. It has brought back the smile on my face and put the jingle in my step.
Christmas in Rite Aid
It’s that magical time of the
year
Filled with egg nog, parties and
good cheer
But life and get hectic and busy
and you need to buy gifts
For loved ones deserve a present
that fits
No need to go far a quick drive
in your car
It’s Christmas in Rite Aid!
Light up your Strikes and roll
your own smokes
Tampons, pads and two-liter cokes
Toenail clippers and a can of
Raid
It’s Christmas in Rite Aid!
There’s a nip and chill in the
air
So shower your loved ones with rollers
for her hair
Or maybe some Metamucil and Pringles
Will make her holidays tingle
It’s Christmas in Rite Aid!
So let’s pop a few Zoloft’s and
burp-free fish oil
Maalox, Aveno, a balm for that
boil
A six-pack of Ensure and a
plug-on from Glade
It’s Christmas in Rite Aid!
Burts Bees for your chapped lips
and RID kill those lice
A romance novella and 99 cent
spice
Grecian Formula in a box cuz your
hair went and grayed
It’s Christmas in Rite Aid!
Everyone needs these items, there’s
no need to be shy
We’ve all had diarrhea, crabs or
a sty
No gift will be wasted when you
buy what friends need
To take care of gas, stinky pits
and each month when we bleed
Happy Holiday’s to everyone goodwill
to all
Please save yourself a stressful
trip to the mall
It’s Christmas in Rite Aid!
What a riot! How does the music go? Can't wait for the video!
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